Gifts? For me? I do declare, Mr Beauregard...

Hey guys, on Thursday last I was given a gift bag/basket-type deal that, as I understand it, was on behalf of many of you which traffic the blog. I wanted to take a moment to thank you guys for your generosity and consideration. 
I also wanted to say - Damnit! The gift cards are difficult for one to use on booze and hookers (you monkeys are so bloody smart). So instead of taking the time to locate a service that accepted iTunes gift cards in exchange for carnal favors or someone that would trade a handle for some nike gear, I settled for the realization that I rarely do drink and if I really wanted a myriad of diseases, I'd rather go hangout in a hospital biohazard bin. 


On the real, I truly was touched by the gesture, and I greatly appreciate your thoughtfulness.

Thanks a ton, bitches!


-Manni

Paleo Challenge Completion Cook-Out!

It is official - We are in the home stretch of the 6-week Paleo Challenge. Congratulations everyone!

Obviously, this means that some serious grub must be consumed to commemorate this event...

And so, to celebrate the completion of the Paleo Challenge - and a new nutritional life-style for some - join us for the Paleo Challenge Cook-Out on Saturday April 23rd at 12:30pm.

This gives everyone another chance to showcase their favorite Paleo recipe. (You know you have one, otherwise you would have all starved to death.)

Use the comments to post what you plan to bring. We are staying Paleo for this shin-dig, so no rice-krispy treats with marshmellows and nutella and peanut butter and butter and... sorry... I was having a moment... anyway... Bring enough for yourself and to share with others. We need it all : meats, sides, desserts, etc.

To recap:
Date: Saturday April 23rd
Time: 12:30pm
Location: the box
Bring: Paleo foodies

See you all there!!!

FREE DAY!!!

Yo monkeys, 
Before you go about devouring everything in sight, I need you to bear in mind a few things:


A - Realize that everything that you put in your body will have some type of consequence. Essentially - the more "bad stuff" you eat, the more it does detract from your gains. Don't panic, not every single calorie will be absorbed by your body (your body will flush some of them out), but a good amount will be considered for fuel storage (aka - fat).


II - As your body is accustomed to eating nutrient dense and low sugar foods (unless you've really been knocking back the fruit), it (your body) may freak out a bit at the surplus. You may even get that sugar-related headache that some, if not all, of us experienced at the beginning of this campaign. 

Please don't ask me to explain this picture...

Tres - Be smart in your choices. If you eat a high sugar/carbohydrate meal, pair it with some good protein. For example, I am considering making myself some pancakes. Mmmmmmmm, pancakes - so delicious.... ooh, where is the pumpkin butter.... what, we're out of pumpkin butter?, fuck!.... ok, I'll put some maple syrup on them bad boys.... yeah right there.... gimmie some more.... mmmmmm, where have you been all my life, [pancakes]!
Wait, what were we talking about? ..... Oh yes, let's say that I am gonna hook myself up with my pumpkin, banana, and candied walnut pancakes - well, that is going to be high in starch, quite. So, I am also going to make myself an omelette. Not just because I fancy myself some tasty omelettes (which I do), but because the added protein will reduce the glycemic impact of all the starch I am going to ingest. Even popping a bit of jerky before a meal will help to not send your insulin levels soaring into the stratosphere.


Lastly - This is your day. Enjoy it! Just don't get stupid with it. I am not trying to scare you at all. I am merely reminding you to be considerate of your efforts up to this point. 


Keepin it real,


-El Leon Negro

Calculating your BASAL METABOLIC RATE (BMR)

Good day to you, my brothas and sistas!
Are you curious of how to go about calculating your BMR. 
Would you like to get yo math 'on?
Well, you are in luck. For I, being the awesome cat that I am, have provided the easiest way to calculate your BMR with the least amount of frustration possible. So, go ahead... math it up.
However, before you get your adorable little panties in a wad, realize that this is a rather broad view into your (possible) BMR.

The BMR formula provided herein uses the variables of height, weight, age and gender to calculate your BMR. This is more accurate than just calculating calorie needs based on body weight alone. Also, it is more finite than the crap which Government agencies, who want me eating the carbohydrate equivalent to 7 slices of bread (not at all considering fruits and veggies) daily, manage to spew out at the ignorant masses. The only factor it omits is lean body mass and thus the ratio of muscle-to-fat a body has. Remember, leaner bodies need more calories than less leaner ones. Therefore, this equation will be very accurate in all but the very muscular (aka swole) becuase it will underestimate calorie needs, and the very fat (aka tubby) because it will over-estimate calorie needs.


English BMR Formula (for you proper monkeys)

 

Chicks: BMR = 655 + ( 4.35 x weight in pounds ) + ( 4.7 x height in inches ) - ( 4.7 x age in years )

 

Dudes: BMR = 66 + ( 6.23 x weight in pounds ) + ( 12.7 x height in inches ) - ( 6.8 x age in year )

Metric BMR Formula (for you foreign monkeys)

 

Chicks: BMR = 655 + ( 9.6 x weight in kilos ) + ( 1.8 x height in cm ) - ( 4.7 x age in years )

 

Dudes: BMR = 66 + ( 13.7 x weight in kilos ) + ( 5 x height in cm ) - ( 6.8 x age in years )

OK. Do you have your BMR down now?
Good.
Wait, wait, wait. You aren't done yet. Now, you will utilize your newfound information/figures to calculate your total daily energy expenditure.
The Harris Benedict Equation is a formula that uses your BMR and then applies an activity factor to determine your total daily energy expenditure (calories). The only factor omitted by the Harris Benedict Equation is lean body mass. Remember, leaner bodies need more calories than less leaner ones. Therefore, this equation will be very accurate in all but the very muscular (will under-estimate calorie needs) and the very fat (will over-estimate calorie needs).


Harris Benedict Formula

 

To determine your total daily calorie needs, multiply your BMR by the appropriate activity factor, as follows:

 

If you are sedentary (little or no exercise) : Calorie-Calculation = BMR x 1.2

 

• If you are lightly active (light exercise/sports 1-3 days/week) : Calorie-Calculation = BMR x 1.375
• If you are moderatetely active (moderate exercise/sports 3-5 days/week) : Calorie-Calculation = BMR x 1.55
• If you are very active (hard exercise/sports 6-7 days a week) : Calorie-Calculation = BMR x 1.725
• If you are extra active (very hard exercise/sports & physical job or 2x training) : Calorie-Calculation = BMR x 1.9 

 
Total Calorie Needs Example

 

If you are sedentary, multiply your BMR (1745) by 1.2 = 2094. This is the total number of calories you need in order to maintain your current weight.

 

Once you know the number of calories needed to maintain your weight, you can easily calculate the number of calories you need to eat in order to gain or lose weight.

What were your results? Please post them, so that I feel some type of reciprocity.
Also, feel free to begin your post with some sort of praise. I am OK with such things...

 

The Black Lion

- Lance Armstrong and I had a "Who has more nuts contest", I won by 5!

OK, We need to talk...

Hello there everybody. How was your weekend?

Yeah, that's great. Listen, I need you to sit down and be quiet.

Go ahead, get comfy.....

 

Alright, ready?

I want to discuss 2 topics that have been irking me just a tad:
TOPIC NUMERO 1 - OVEREATING

TOPIC NUMERO 2 - DESSERTS

Some of you freaks are eating way too much and/or not enough of the right things.

Wait, I thought that you couldn't overeat while being Paleo?

Ok, first of all, we aren't at the Q&A section of this little chat, so at ease your face and listen. If I may continue...
Yes, I recall something to that tune. I do not remember me saying there is no way you can overeat while following Paleo. I do, however, remember someone saying, "technically, you can't overeat on Paleo" and me nodding pleasantly with an upturned lower lip.
Can one overeat? Yes, sure. If I knock out a rack of ribs with a 2 loaded sweet potatoes, wash it down with half a bottle of mead, and then sit in front of the tube mindlessly eating a bowl full of fudge-babies..... I overate. Sure I technically was 100% Paleo - Robb Wolf, himself, would attest to this. Still, is it the smartest way for me to go about it? NO, bitches, it most certainly is not. Being Paleo is not a passport to Stuffyourfaceville (population - you), it is a passport to a healthier and better conditioned you - granted you do it correctly.

Let's re-evaluate our reason(s) for trying the challenge.
If you are in it for losing some weight and/or toning up - You need to be mindful of intake.
If you are in it just to have better looking bloodwork - You should be a bit mindful of intake.
If you are in it to have better recovery following work-outs and overall athletic prowess - You don't need to be as mindful of intake, but it would not hurt for you to try not overindulging.
If you just want to be healthy, already look good naked, and need to gain some lean mass - You can take a shot of olive oil.

If, at this point in the challenge, you are not seeing any results, then you need to take a look at your daily caloric and nutritional intake. Now, I don't want you to starve yourself. If your metabolic demands are 1800Kcal to 2000Kcal, I prefer that you teeter close/above 2000 than  close to/below 1800; but you shouldn't go significantly above 2k.

This leads me into my second topic... Desserts!

Wait Manni, I was under the impression that...

Holy crap, we still aren't in the Q&A! Shhhuuuuuuush!

The topic of Desserts and Overeating go hand in hand prancing merrily through a glorious meadow. For you see, they are bosom buddies. Some people are relying to deeply on dessert foods. Honestly, I think that some of us may be consuming too much dessert foods. Again, even if it is Paleo, don't just shove it in your facehole. 

Mmmm - Paleo Brownies - nom, nom, nom.

Mmmm - Mead - glug, glug glug.
Mmmm - Fried Apples - nom, nom, nom.
Mmmm - 85% Dark Chocolate - nom, nom, nom.
Hooray - Vino - glug, glug, glug.
Mmmm - Paleo Blackberry cobbler - nom, nom, nom.
It's all Paleo, yay!
WRONG!

Yes, they are all Paleo but most, if not all, dessert foods are full of sugars and may also be a bit overstocked with fat. Of course I do remember saying that sugar, not fat, should be your primary concern during all of this, but I stand adamant to the idea that you need to monitor your intake. Not every meal needs to be followed up with a dessert. If you really need something to munch on, have a piece of raw fruit or make yourself an Almond Milk Latte. Discipline! 
Keep it low-cal and low C₁₂H₂₂O₁₁
Remember, you can't always have cake because it can't always be a special day. A couple times a week is fine, but if you do it all the time, then you will sabotage your efforts and 6 weeks later you're thinking that The Black Lion and his "Paleo" rubbish were specious and unprolific.
No, no, no - let's call a spade a spade.
You were unsuccessful! You let you down. 
I have heard from plenty of people who feel better, have lost plenty of weight, are recovering faster from their workouts, and even claim to exhibit a better complexion. Is this anecdotal evidence? - perhaps. Still, why don't you take a moment to reflect on your meals for the last week and be honest with yourself? Have you maintained the guidelines? Have you been adherent? Did you really need all that dried fruit before going to bed? Just a thought...

Remember to mind your caloric (and nutrient) intake in relation to your caloric expenditure.
Now, I will admit that I, on occasion, eat a bit more than I should, but I am still meeting my goals, and I do increase my phyiscal activity in attempts to counterbalance said occasions.
I'm just asking that you monkeys be mindful of you and to be honest with yourself.  Mind this - maybe you should keep an intake journal. Write down everything (except for water) that you are consuming. It may help shed some perspective.

I am done lecturing, so I will move on to a lighter note:
For those of you that were not present for the cookout on Saturday past, I want you to know that you missed out on a spectacular feast. Marks salmon was perfectly cooked, Rogelio's chicken never dissappoints, Mike's chicken was miracoulously moist, Felton's [baked chicken and shredded apples] dish was great, the pesto chicken was on point, whatever the hell Jared's beef balls are called were delicious, poking fun at [Sumi the veggie-head] was nourishing to all of our souls, the spread of veggies was wonderful, the wine that Tristan brought was....umm,... consumed, and the several other dishes not mentioned were all scrum-diddly-umptious. The cook-out was a success and good times were had by all.

Be well.
-El Leon Negro!



now we can have a Q&A...